People make up and break up every single day all around the world. You have either been cheated on by at least one dumb boyfriend/girlfriend or—in the very least—you know at two people who have been cheated on. Nowadays men and women cheat almost as often in numbers but the reasons behind the cheating can be very different. So I did some research to delve into the minds of male lovers all across the spectrum and have concluded that there are five particular reasons why men cheat.
1) They’ve gotten away with it before: men who do not get caught cheating the first time are often repeat offenders. This could very well be the first time a man cheats but, chances are that if he’s done it before without consequences (a crazy messy breakup and possibly broken household items) then his continued interest in infidelity are peeked and he’ll continue to test limits.
2) Men can’t say no: personally, the notion that men are unable to say “no” is complete bull but according to a survey conducted by a leading men’s magazine, men lack the willpower to say “no” when an opportunity to have a sexual affair arises. Call it being in the “heat of the moment” or whatnot but the idea of a random or quick sexcapade with an ex or random Jane is tempting to men.
3) The love is gone: it’s not uncommon for a couple to just simply drift apart over t
ime. Men who cheat may also crave the intimacy they are no longer getting in their current relationship. Instead of communicating about the lack of intimacy, men will seek out other places to find it—all to avoid a possible fight with their loved one. More so than intimacy, some men genuinely fall out of love with their spouse and instead of breaking up, for fear of being left alone, they find their own happiness in someone else—only prolonging the inevitable breakup.
4) They want control: whether you’re married or simply in a relationship with your significant other, some men feel they lose the “male dominance” of being with a woman. In order to appease a potential argument, men sometimes “give up” to “keep the peace.” According to psychiatrist Gail Saltz, MD, men cheat because they want to have some sense of control and power in the relationships and this infidelity allows them to have it. This also makes it “exciting” and challenging leading into the very next reason why men cheat.
5) They like variety: after being with the same person for some time, men tend to get bored. While they may genuinely love and care for you, you become seen as the routine. This is the line where men and women differ. Generally speaking, for men it’s more about quantity than quality and for women it’s the exact opposite. Men get excited with variety and while women love variety as well, we simply enjoy a variety of things with the same person. Not to say women do not cheat—we cheat almost as often as men do. But when a woman cheats it’s most commonly known to be due to lack of intimacy and communication in the relationship. For men, well it’s almost as if they use every excuse as an excuse to cheat.